I remember back home on Guam the way the ocean twinkled underneath the night's sky. How the water reached the shore ever so gently and filtered through the tiny grains of sand, displacing them over and over again. It was calming, peaceful, and I will never forget the feeling it gave me.

Isn't that exactly how life is? We are constantly tossed and displaced and moved around. 

I'm always looking for inspiration from nature, and this may as well be the perfect fit for what I'm trying to say.

Did you know that based on the size of the grains of sand, pebbles, or rocks on a beach or coast, you can easily determine what conditions they were exposed to?

It's quite simple. Fine grain sand is exposed to powerful ocean swells that repeatedly toss the grains until they become round and polished. Larger pebbles or rocks that are freshly weathered have not yet traveled very far, therefore are not rounded and smoothed. 

Larger pebbles or rocks also suggest that they've been carried to the shore by larger waves, while smaller particles are carried away over longer distances, eventually reaching further, calmer shores.

We all know that fine textured, white, powdery sand is valued all around the world. What if I told you that you must go through the same process as sand if you want to become refined, rounded, and smoothed. You need to travel long distances, be carried away and tossed around by large waves before you reach a place of calm, like what happened on that beach at the beginning of my story.

Things happen in nature that are just that - natural, unobstructed, and part of a process. They are the most beautiful things. There's a cause and effect to everything, and that's something that we don't really think about on a daily basis. We don't realize that we are also part of a process.

We can't really expect different results if we are doing the exact same thing that leads to the result that we don't like. We need to change something in that process in order for change to occur. I am a firm believer that change is necessary, and it is so ingrained in me that I am not scared of it. I accept it, and I welcome it.

Let me give you a bit of context. Growing up, I always moved around. It was never in my mind that I would stay in one place for the rest of my life, nor was it ingrained in me that anyone was guaranteed to stay in my life. It may sound sad, but it's just a part of who I am and who I became. I had to learn to let go at an early age. Of people. Of places. Of situations that weren't good. It was never easy for me, but I had to adapt. 

As an adult, I guess it's so ingrained in me that I have to keep moving forward that I need it. I can't stay in one place or get complacent, especially if I'm not seeing growth within myself. I can't get myself to settle for less than what I know I'm capable of.

What I'm trying to get at is that there is something that you can do to be where you want to be. Change. Change is hard, but it is necessary. You can't wait for change to happen. You have to be the change and be the cause of it. You have to live intentionally if you want to see the life that you desire.

Coming from a small island, it's easy to get complacent and comfortable. It's easy to go with the motions and do the exact same thing over and over again expecting different results. I know exactly how it feels. I believe in persistence, but not if it's not leading me to becoming a better person or to a better place. 

You may not come from a small island like me, and I'm not limiting this kind of behavior to certain environments, but that's my reality that I personally was faced with. Limiting thoughts and behaviors happen to all of us. Naturally, we want to stay in the safe zone - on the shore.

The truth is, you have to break away from what is comfortable. You have to do the things that scare you. You have to be the one to challenge yourself. You have to be the one to say enough is enough. You have to want better for yourself and for your future. It's all dependent on you and only you.

Coming from one of the most beautiful places on earth makes me reflect on the memories that are forever ingrained in me. When they say no place is like home, it's true. But, it's only true when you leave home. When your eyes become open to the world around you. When you step outside of known territory and into something different and challenging.

Leaving home is always hard, but it is necessary - in a literal and figurative sense. Home can be anywhere you find comfort in. It may be a job, a person, a habit, a way of thinking, etc.

The only way for you to have new eyes is to literally remove yourself from the very place that you've become numb to. I don't believe that anyone should become numb at any point in life. Life is meant to be felt and to be experienced. Becoming apathetic toward life, to me, is a slow and painful death. I never ever want to become that way.

Once you feel yourself starting to get numb, that should be a sign that something needs to change. Sometimes that change needs to happen from within. Other times, external factors need to change.

Life is all about constant evaluation. No one is meant to stay in the exact same place, especially if it is unhealthy to them or leading them to be less than what they are capable or deserving of.

Nowhere in this post will I say that it is easy. It is extremely hard and difficult. We get really comfortable even with things that aren't good for us. We tolerate things and give excuses for the very things that we know are wrong for us. 

At one point in time, I was in a very emotionally and mentally destructive relationship and I stayed. Why? Because I was already at that point where I found comfort in the process. Destructive patterns are hard to break from, and I can say from experience that I have struggled with it, and I know what it feels like. I know that I will continue to be faced with destructive patterns that I constantly need to reevaluate. This is life.

In any process of breaking, stretching, or growing, there will be resistance, and you will have to go through the pain associated with it in order to come out stronger. 

Pain is part of the process of growth. It may not be physical pain, but it could be emotional pain or mental pain, which is not any less painful.

One thing I know for sure is that each time I went through a painful process, I always emerged a better person with so much more to give and knew that I was deserving of so much more. 

Today, I encourage you to do the very thing you know you need to do. Don't wait until it's too late. There is something better for you. A better process. A better outcome. You can't expect to get to a certain ideal place unless you grow through life. You can't simply go through it. You must learn something and truly let your life unfold without holding onto things that you know are hindering you from your best self. Your best life.

In closing, be like sand. Travel far. Be refined. You're becoming your best self through the process. It may be difficult, but nothing of value ever came to be without being exposed to the elements. You'll reach a place of calm, eventually. When all is said and done, the distance you traveled will equal the depth of your experience. Let the waves mold you.

Cheers to you experiencing the best of life. 

As the new year approaches, it's a great time to start thinking about the deeper things and constantly holding yourself accountable to the direction that your life takes. I hope I've inspired you a teeny bit with this post. xo

If you need more inspiration on the daily, I post every day on Instagram + I keep you motivated and inspired. 

Did you find this helpful? I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!